A Lover's Note: Her Confessions

Dear Mr. Love Consultant,

Hello, Mister. My name's Ingrid and I'm from Wisconsin. Firstly, I'd just like to personally congratulate you for the 2 years of success that your radio program has achieved. I'm one of your avid listeners all over the planet, I genuinely love listening to your program each and every night. Not only does it nurse the hearts of the inconsolable people, but those who aren't even heartbroken can also pick up something really good too. I have to say this: YOUR PROGRAM ROCKS! AND SO DO YOU, MISTER! :) And also, this is my 7th time sending you a letter. I've already done 6 attempts of sending you the same letter, with the very same content. But I guess it was only one of those major epic fails I'd get in my years of existence. Since last week, I've been trying to send this, and after I sent 'em I listened later each night to find out if I'd get the lucky chance for you to pick and choose my letter that it could be read on the radio for all your listeners to hear my story. But that never happened within the whole previous week. And now, I just expectantly hope that my 7th try hits the target tonight.

Okay, sorry for the long intro, Mister. I know you sorta hate long intro's but I just had to say all of those stuffs there. Now let's talk turkey here and put the cards on the table -I will now get to the main point. I may not be heartbroken, but I do have a problem right now. I am not heartbroken, I'm in fact very happy..very happy that this whole fling has nearly blinded me. I'm sorry, Mister but I'm really having a hardtime explaining every detail here. It'll certainly take me long novels to write before I could explicate my point. OH MAN, WHERE DO I START NOW?

Mr. Love Consultant, my big question is: How wrong is it for me to be in a relationship?

Okay, that didn't sound right. I know that anybody who's in a relationship would rarely ask that, or even never ask something like that. Sounds quite stupid, but that question isn't finished yet. It's only like a phrase there - it doesn't express a
complete thought yet. Right, I need to explain this now 'cause everything's now making you feel perplexed. (SORRY) Alright. Alright, Mister. You see, I have a boyfriend right now. But there's a catch there... The guy is 18 years older than me. @_@

Sure, people have always said "Age doesn't matter". But realistically speaking, that statement could be proven wrong too. It's easy to say that, but once you get into a relationship where you know you have a huge age gap with the person, you'll suddenly say, "Sometimes, it isn't really like that." I say that 'cause I experience it..just lately. I can't believe it, Mister. I'm only 18 years old and I'm deeply inlove with a 36-year old man. And wait, did I mention he's my first boyfriend? It's like..wow. Things just happened so quick, at once. I never expected this -Okay I'm lying. I sorta-kinda-slightly-a bit expected this, but seriously?!! NEVER THOUGHT THAT MY IMPRACTICAL EXPECTATIONS WOULD COME TRUE. I did like him the first time we met, but seriously?! Didn't see this coming, Mister!

We first met at my friend's party. He seemed like a huge party animal, and he had been burning on the dance floor the whole time. He caught my eyes, he was very noticeable and stood out pretty much. He was super striking, his moves appealed to me like holy smokes. I joined all my friends dancing, and I realized he was circulating over the whole dance floor, mingling with different people, dancing with each and every person he didn't even personally know. And I figured, "This is going to be great." I just stayed there shaking and grooving to the boppin' music, waiting for the moment that he comes up dancing to me. And it happened. When he approached me, and we started dancing and everything, that was just the beginning. It was real late when I went home. I went home with a love-struck smile beamed all over my face, not thinking that my life would be changed that night.

Since that night, I would receive several phone calls from him, with myself returning the call. Sending e-mails, back-and-forth, all those stuffs infatuated people would do. I thought it was cute. Days have passed so fast, as fast as I have gotten crazy for the guy. I could tell he feels the same way. It didn't take long 'til he asked me out quite often, to the point that I have lied to my parents. I HID EVERYTHING ABOUT THE TWO OF US, I HID THEM FROM MY PARENTS. Aside from the fact that they didn't let me have a boyfriend yet, I figured it would be worse if they knew I was dating a guy who's 18 years older than me. I wholeheartedly love, respect, and show consideration for my parents..but honestly, Mister, I can't believe that for the very first time, I hid something very clandestine from them. Only my bestfriend knew, and I think my boyfriend has also told a trusted friend of him about it. It's a crazy relationship, and I'm enjoying it so much...or I was enjoying earlier. I felt very secure around him, it's like I'm safe and sound in his arms. "You're on my mind all the time. I think I'm stuck on you." he told me once. That was the sweetest thing I heard from him, and boy did I act like a smitten cat. I was so love-struck this time, pretty crazy. When he confessed his true feelings to me, and told me that he really loves me, honestly it wasn't hard to believe his words. 'Cause I felt it pretty much. Everytime I'm with him I can tell he truly cares about me, it's as simple as that. And he respects me. I remember one time, we accidentally spent the night over his crib, and ofcourse we slept in his room, like in one bed. But with no holds barred, I can truthfully tell you and everyone else that NOTHING HAPPENED THERE. I was in fact treated like a newborn baby, if you know what I mean. (laughs) We just cuddled, kissed, and he just kept stroking and caressing me to sleep. I felt like I was on cloud nine. I felt his sincerity all along.





Almost a perfect relationship, I don't understand why there needs something to bother me. We're like the happiest people on Earth now, but why can't these catches just leave us alone?! First, I'm hiding it from my parents...a very bad and regretful act of a child to the parents. He's also hiding it from people. Our relationship is like..."cloak-and-dagger-love". Even I couldn't quite figure it out why we had to keep it a secret. We're very happy but if you just examine our relationship very well, you can say that it really feels sad that it can't be open to the public. The second and main catch, is the age gap. Like honestly! As I said, it's easy to say age doesn't matter but it's never really like that at all! I'm 18, young and still have bright plans for myself, what if this relationship would only be the one to hinder me from achieving my goals? What if it gets in my way one day and makes me ruin my beautiful dreams? What if he proposes?! What if he asks me to marry him?! I'M DOOMED! I know he told me once, "I'm willing to wait however long it will be" But nobody can tell, that promise could be broken too. In my mind, thoughts are playing. Can he really wait? Will his feelings never really change couple of years from now? I love him so much and I know I just need to trust him, but honestly it's so hard not to doubt about it. It's complicated! He has no idea about how much I'm struggling right now. I'm not telling him any of these things, I don't want him to worry more about me, about us. I love him very much, he loves me very much too, but I just have to take in a lot of things to consideration. It's hard.

Mister, should the two of us keep going steady or is it better that I break up with him? I know you give the most excellent advices ever, and you're all that I need now. Both decisions have their own consequences that will surely make me suffer, but on the bright side I know I will see their own significance too. Things will have to happen for a reason, that's a fact. I just hope I choose the very right thing to do, and you can help me figure out what's better, please, Mister. Thanks in advance.

Love, Ingrid


What'suppie folks?! It was too early when I woke up, I got nothing to do and I ended up basically doing this short fictional lover's note. HAHA. Anyways, whatcha guys think of this? If you were Mr. Love Consultant, what advice would you give to Ingrid? She'd love to know. ;) And oh, The Sims 3 (EA) is really a good means of illustrating your thoughts. ;)

Been a retreatant for the last 3 days. ;)

IT'S SO GOOD TO BE BACK HOME! WHAT'SUPPIE FOOOOOOOLKS?!!!!! =)
Wow, what a feeling. I've been out of doors for the last 3 days, and to get back home is just an easing sensation. The feeling you get when you get the chance to sleep on mattress of your bed that feels restful like no other, to get in the shower of your bathroom that is zesty like no other, to have meals in your own dining room, to watch TV, to make use again of your gadgets, to lay hands on your computer, and to finally go Tweeting, FB'ing, YM'ing, and BLOGGING.....AHHHHH IT'S JUST AMAZING. Indeed, there's no place like home ;)

So for the last 3 days, together with my college blockmates, I had a retreat. We spent 3 days at the extension home of our school, our retreat house at Antipolo. We left on Friday, and got back home Sunday night. Man, the whole thing was tiring, ofcourse. At almost every aspect in our lives, we never fail to experience TIREDNESS. And that is a fact my folks ;) So yeah..finishing what I was saying, we were there for 3 days. Honestly, I didn't feel like it was a retreat but..well, maybe it's just that I barely felt the spirit of that retreat we had. I only shed tears when almost all of us cried during the most touching part of the event, I was touched, but yeah that was it. Oh well. Though it seemed that way, I have to say that everything was fun. At first, I thought I'd only have fun in the bus during the whole trip. Eventually, I realized that the most fun part of this experience was during bedtime. I don't know, it's just totally pleasurable. We usually slept for less than 5 hours, others only slept for only 30-somethin'-minutes while others never really slept. There was just something about bedtime why we couldn't sleep at night. HAHAHAHA ;) And...what else to say, uhm. Oh yeah, THE FOOD. The food there was incredible. Like totally dude! Absolutely delish!~ Every meal we had was heavy to the tummy, good thing I didn't feel like defecating LOL. That's one of the things I don't like in this world - to defecate in a different home. HAHAHA. And ofcourse, the whole place was so lovely. It's just lovely. You'd love to stay in that place for long, unless you already wanna go home. Anyways...the whole experience was incredible. Lot of us had some certain realizations, which was awesome. And I just hope these realizations last, that we felt them not only because we were in a retreat..if you know what I mean :)) HAHAHA.

So yeah. That's all for this post. I was actually about to blog last night but after watching WWE Summerslam I fell asleep. Today is our rest day. We actually have a meeting for some kind of event for tomorrow, but I'm not able to go for I am not feeling well today. Bit sick. I'll get better anyways. =]

An inspiring kid in ATC.

What'suppie folks? Been like 10 days since my last post. Holy cow how happy do I feel right now that we've got no PE classes tomorrow no moreee baby yeah!!!! Back to the regular schedule, Monday! Now we only have M-T-Th in our scheds yeah! ;) Great.

Anyways. I just wanna share an adorable thing with the world right now. Earlier today, one of our prof's for today was absent, her subject was Histo101 that starts at 11:00am-12:30pm..Which only means we have a FREE CUT dude! HOLY COW WHAT JOY ;) Lol. With that said, myself together with my folks Sarah and Sison went outside the campus to a local mall there called Alabang Town Center (simply ATC or Town), chilaxxed and had lunch there. But upon our lunch, there was somethin' we didn't expect, not at all. It was a sweet surprise. Look at what we've found:






Define what we saw this lunch: JUST ONE OF THE MOST ADORABLE THINGS ON EARTH. We were comfortably seated having our lunch til this kid caught our attention. He was the cutest kid ever. He kept waving on us, and we waved back. He kept smiling on us, we smiled back. WE WERE TALKING TO HIM. HE CUTELY RESPONDED TO EVERY QUESTION WE ASKED. It was sweet. He was inspiring. He was a very enthusiastic 2-year old boy. He was cute. He was super cute. I fell in love with him <3

TRIMMED.

Honestly, I don't know how others can relate to this one but probably, this situation applies more especially to my fellow girls out there.

Yes, I said FELLOW GIRLS. Alright alright, before you guys could say anything against that statement, let me inform you that I'm still a girl inside though it isn't that obvious at all...LOL!~!! :)) Silly words. I mean I'm boyish and have been misunderstood as a tomboy a lot of fudgin' times, but I really am a girl. If ya ask what kind of girly stuff I'm into, the number one thing is: NAIL ART lol ;) But seriously. That's what this blog is going to be all about folks.

You know, as a girl, when you had grown your fingernails out and had kept it long ever since, it wouldn't be so easy for you to trim them. Seeing the beauty it displays along with your fingers is just amazing. You've waited for a long time to have that look on your hands, you've spent like eternity to grow them out, and finally reach the moment that you could fling those fingers so gracefully as those long nails stick out in all their glory. And you utter the words, "SPLENDID. HOW BEAUTIFUL." However, there'd come a day that you'd feel tired and quite dissatisfied with them too, then later coming up with the idea of TRIMMING THEM DOWN. On another note, you worry a bit much too, thinking that if you trimmed them down, you would suffer again from the long time and eternity you'd hardly spend while growing your nails out. IT IS SUCH A NOT SO EASY SITUATION AT ALL.

Idk if it's overacting or anything like that folks. But that's just what it feels like. It's never easy to cut them down. Never easy to trim down all those nails you've worked hard for, well..if you guys know what I mean. 'Cause for me, trimming them down is almost like "resetting your life" somehow. It's almost equivalent to NEW YEAR. Hahaha. And yeah, aside from that..you'll also be remorseful in the end. But I made a decision, and there I go. My nails are trimmed down to their normal length. It's like a new start now. And takin' the next step. ;)

FORMULATING THE NEWEST EQUATION IN MY LIFE! ;)

PE Class on Wednesday +

Dismissal at 10am +

Gettin' home early +

Catchin' up Showtime +

Bein' able to see Jhong Hilario =

FULFILLING DAY :)